Journal with Impact: Personal Reflection Congruence

Workshop: Six Conversations for Writing Creative Journals

“It’s about being who we are that will determine what we do.” Jay Kesler

Congruence (c)

Jay Kesler suggests a three-part list exercise to examine our congruence as a way to scrutinize if our life in action matches up with what we say we believe.

We often instinctively go into survivor mode when unexpected events spring into our lives. Both positive and negative situations can create an external and internal emotional shift in our life patterns that is unsettling.

We usually bounce back quickly from a major inconvenience, like a flat tire en route to an important meeting, and we often can cope effectively in short and long term worries, such as in health warnings or fall out from weather disasters. Yet when life returns to what we presume to be our "normal," we may not realize that we have inserted some false or unrealistic coping techniques that are not good for us in the long run.

Taking some time out for a congruence thermometer can give us a measuring rod to help us navigate our ever-changing responsibilities and relationships before we risk disconnecting with ourselves and others close to us.

I recommend using different color pens or paper for this idea process.

1.    List yourself in relation to people, responsibilities, ministries, et cetera. What is your public persona?

2.    List your feelings in relation to these roles and activities.

3.    List the passions, desires, wishes, and dreams on your heart. Is there a particular place of service or activity that you hunger to be involved in? If not, why not?

4.    Look over your three lists. Are they congruent with one another?

Did you discover any lack of congruence?

Action Steps:

1.     Go back over your notes and circle all the places that are in sync. Underline all the places that aren’t and highlight words that don’t seem to match anywhere.

2.     Divide your surprises into positive and negative. Make a note next to each as to why you feel that way.

3.     Choose one positive to strengthen even more and one negative to begin to change over the next week.

4.     Consider both short-term and long-term plans to bridge any lack of congruence you discovered within your relationship with yourself or others.

Share: Were you surprised by any of your answers?

                                                            Read deep, marcy